Top 7: New TV Shows

Big week for TV last week. Here are the new shows I find most promising (in order from best to worst):

1. Bored to Death HBO - Jason Schwartzman stars as a recently dumped writer who decides to become a private detective. It co-stars Ted Danson and Zack Galifianakis and it's funny and quirky and dark and awesome. I'm not gonna lie. My adoration for this show may be mostly based on the fact that I want to have 10,000 of Jason Schwartzman's babies. And yes, I realize he's, like, 5'2".

2. FlashForward ABC - Imagine, if you will, the entire human race blacks out for 2+ minutes and flashes 6 months into the future. What do you do with that knowledge of the future? WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!?! This one looks pretty cool and Lost-ish. I do wonder how they'll continue this story beyone one season. Will everyone black out and flash forward again? That would be retarded.

3. Castle ABC - So it's not technically "new" as it debuted last season, but it's new to me (I started watching reruns this summer) so I'm including it. Nathan Fillion is maybe the best thing on TV. So hilarious and dreamy. For the fellas, Stana Katic isn't too shabby herself.

Look at his cute ginger daughter!!!

4. Glee Fox - I think it's getting better because it's getting more ridiculous. Though, they really need to kill of Jessalyn Gilsig ASAP.

5. Community NBC - I'm warming to this new comedy. I do really enjoy Joel McHale...and Trudy from Mad Men is adorable...and who doesn't enjoy some Chevy Chase...but I seriously don't buy the premise that Joel McHale would work so hard to persue that blond girl. She's just not that interesting. I'll give it half a season to improve.

6. Modern Family ABC - I really want to hate this show, but it made me LOL several times...even if most of those funny moments were in the trailer. (Are they still called trailers if they are for TV shows?) I love the dad who thinks he's super hip, though, and will keep watching. "WTF: Why The Face."

7. Eastwick ABC - Okay, I'm really not sure about this one, but the first episode was kind of fun, right? Like Desperate HouseWitches, no? (P.S. I never watched DH) And it has the crazy lady from the movie version and WWW's girlfriend Sara Rue, so that's something. They guy who plays the Devil is truly atrocious, though. How did any test audience not pan this guy into oblivion? You know what? I think I just talked myself out of ever watching this again. Thanks, me!

What the frak was I thinking?!

DVR Dilemma

I need help. For the first time since it's use became widespread, I am sharing a DVR and I want, nay NEED, to establish some DVR Rules of Etiquette.

You see, my lovely roommate D and I have been living in TV harmony for most of the summer. There wasn't much to watch and what there was, like Rescue Me, I'd record, watch and delete, knowing she stopped watching Denis Leary bang everyone and their mother seasons ago. But now, NOW, there is so much on that we both watch and love, cleaning the DVR is becoming an issue (only for me, mind you, because I am neurotic and thisclose to obsessive-compulsive). I love watching a show and then immediately deleting it. I find this insanely therapeutic. I realize this is weird (I also love doing laundry and dishes. Like I said, I'm weird), but now I keep most of the shows on the DVR for D (we rarely watch things together as she has something called "A boyfriend" and "A life," both of which I'm seriously looking into acquiring). And it's not that I mind saving them for her. I don't at all, but I worry (seriously, this keeps me up at night) that we will both watch something, but leave it on the DVR thinking the other hasn't watched it yet, and then the DVR will fill up and I will freak out and next thing you know we've run out of space and never learn how Ted meets the freaking mother!!!

I realize this problem could easily be solved by what the kids call "talking about it," but I hate making TV so important it leads to a weekly conversation about clearing the DVR (yes, I realize the ridiculousness here. Shut up). I thought about making a list and having us each check off when we've watched things, but that seems truly ridiculous, too. So, I'm hoping you have some solutions for me, dear readers. How do you deal with clearing the DVR? Obviously, my fragile psyche needs your help.

There wasn't a logical, interesting image to go with this post, so here's a half-naked Jamie Bamber!

Go See This: Big Fan

Patton Oswalt’s a funny guy. So when he does a movie about a sad little man who’s life revolves around making comedically hyperbolic phone calls to a local sports talk radio show about his beloved New York Giants, you’d think it’d be hilarious right?

But Big Fan is not a comedy. Its funny, but the humor comes out of just how serious Oswalt’s character, Paul, takes himself and his nightly screeds. It’s about what its like to have your life completely and thoroughly revolve around a sports team; a sports team that doesn’t know you exist, but which you wouldn’t exist without.

It’s a great movie period, but if you’ve ever spent even five minutes listening to sports talk radio, you’ll wonder why it took this long for someone to make this movie in the first place.

Paul is in his mid to late 30s, works in a parking garage and lives with his mother, but on the late night sports airwaves, he is an artist. He spends his time at work writing opuses about how the Giants are amazing, and the Philadelphia Eagles suck, and then reads them on the air at night, hoping listeners will think he’s coming up with it all off the cuff.

For a while, the movie just follows Paul around, showing how everyone is depressed about his life except him. It picks up speed when he and a friend have a chance encounter with Paul’s favorite player, and the encounter goes horribly wrong. Paul spends the rest of the film trying (and failing) to deal with the fallout.

Big Fan was written and directed by the guy who wrote The Wrestler, and it has some of the same tragic-comic overtones. I’d imagine Patton Oswalt will get some Oscar buzz for his performance, but I’d shocked if he wins. Not because his performance is bad – on the contrary, it’s amazing. But it’s amazing because it’s so real. There’s not a whole lot of the “ActING!” that the Academy likes to honor. Paul is just a schlub who gets all his self-worth from a football team he can’t even afford to see live.

Does he take it to extreme levels? Sure. But I think anyone’s who’s ever worn a team jersey or hat well into adulthood can sympathize, if only just a little.

Happy Birthday, Guinness!

Today is a very special day for connoiseurs of fine beer. It marks the 250th anniversary of Guinness stout!


OK, this date is a little arbitrary - The Guinness brewery at St. James Gate in Dublin was leased to the company on Dec. 31, 1759, and Arthur Guinness had been making his special brew for a few years before that. But today is Arthur Guinness' birthday, and since Dec. 31 is kind of already taken as a holiday, the Guinness company decided to make today, Sept. 24, "Arthur's Day."

As the first beer I ever finished a glass of, and my reigning favorite, Guinness holds a special place in my heart. To mark this occasion, I'll be going out to enjoy a pint (or two) of the black gold tonight. And in addition to that, I'll tell you all some fun facts about the beer, accompanied by some of its rad advertisements:

- Though people think of it as filling, Guinness contains only 198 calories per pint! That is less than most light beers, wine, orange juice, or even light milk!

- Legend has it that at some point in the 250 years they've been brewing Guinness, some health inspectors came in for a routine inspection. They found dead rats in some of the beer vats, and made the company clean them out. After this though, the Guinness didn't taste as good. So (again, according to legend) to this day, they throw meat into the vats while brewing Guinness to bring back the distinct flavor. What kind of meat, the legend doesn't say.

- According to a study at the University of Wisconis, a pint of Guinness a day works as well as an aspirin to prevent heart clots that raise the risk of heart attacks.

- Some people say you can determine a person's nationality by counting the rings of foam left on their glass after they've had a pint of Guinness. An Irishman will have 3 or 4 rings, an American will have 6 or 7, and Australians don't have any.

Happy Birthday, Boss!

Well licky, licky, look who's 60!

Bruce Springsteen is celebrating the big six-O today, and we here at The Watchword wish him the happiest of birthdays. True story: My dad once helped Bruce and the E Street Band set up for a gig in Boston before he was famous! (Before Bruce was famous, I mean. My dad is still waiting for someone to discover him at the soda fountain).

As all our faithful readers know, Red is the real Bruce fan at this site, and she took a break from filming Girls Gone Wild: The Lower Ninth Ward! to send in this tribute:

"The Boss is the primary reason I fell for two fellas, neither of whom turned out to be any good for me."

Thanks for sharing, dollface.

Honestly though, I would like to take this opportunity to thank Red for showing me just how brilliant Bruce actually is. Until she came into my life, I mostly knew him as the "Glory Days" guy. And don't just take my word for it, ask Cusack:

Here's to many more, Boss!

Rank: Quentin Tarantino*

*[You might want to check out the Writer's Note at the end of this before reading]

I finally saw Inglorious Basterds over the weekend. Like Coen Brothers movies, whenever I see a new Quentin Tarantino film, I have a compulsive need to compare it to his others. With apologies to Grindhouse (because I didn’t see it), here’s how I would rank Tarantino's movies:

5. Jackie Brown – Chronically underrated. Even though I’m putting it at #5, this is still an awesome movie. It should have done to Pam Greer’s career what Pulp Fiction did for Travolta.

4. Inglorious Basterds – I really enjoyed this movie, but my worst fears came true: A summer full of people telling me it’s the MOVIE OF THE YEAR!!!! set the bar too high, and I couldn’t help but nitpick it a little. I’d like to see it again, a second viewing may bump it into third place, ahead of ….

3. Reservoir Dogs – The movie that taught the world how - with good writing and the right soundtrack - extreme violence could be transformed into high art. In other words, the movie that introduced the world to Tarantino.

2. Kill Bill Vols. I & II – I count these movies as one film, as they were originally intended to be. Alone, they are decent, though certainly lower on the list. Together, I think they’re something akin to a masterpiece. I know not a lot of people disagree with me. Those people should get their wrongness looked at.

1. Pulp Fiction – Still the gold standard. Who would have thought Rashomon and 1970s kitsch could mash up so well? Infinitely re-watchable and quotable, I’m not sure Tarantino will ever out-do Pulp Fiction. And he doesn’t need to.

What do you guys think?

* Writer's Note: So, I just realized Red did a really similar post to this like, a month ago. (And when I say "really similar," I mean basically the same thing. (Well, not exactly the same, because she included films he just wrote, and her order was different. But still)). I wish I could use the, "Hey, I don't read this blog," excuse, but I can't, because I do. I apologize for the redundancy, and I hope we can all still be friends. Red will be back to protect me from myself next week.

Top Five: Emmy Awards

The Emmys were last night. Regularly we would have had like four preview posts, breaking down matchups and making picks, but this year we didn’t. I don’t know why, we just didn’t, OK?!?! Is that ALL RIGHT with you??

Ahem … But since GitW is legally obligated (look it up) to at least mention every awards show, here are my Top 5 favorite moments from last night’s broadcast:

1) Neal Patrick Harris as host. That nice young man from Doogie Howser, MD is so charming. Seriously, I thought NPH was a great host. I couldn’t think of one specific moment, but overall he was funny and quick and all that good stuff. I especially liked how he introduced presenters by their least known roles.

2) Kristin Chenoweth’s acceptance speech. Chenoweth won for Pushing Daisies, which was of course cancelled last year. Her speech was like a parody of a weepy actress acceptance speech, with a lot of blubbering and hand fanning, but I had to laugh when she said, “I’m unemployed now, so I’d like to be on Mad Men. I also like The Office and 24.”

3) Sarah Silverman’s mustache. When they were showing all the nominees for Best Comedy Actress, Silverman was randomly wearing a mustache. Maybe you had to be there, but it was odd and screwball and perfect.

4) Dr. Horrible! If you guys haven’t seen Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog yet, type the typey over to Hulu and check it out. They managed to work it into the Emmy broadcast, y fue fantisco.

5) Michael Emerson!!! Michael Emerson has been taking Lost to another level since he joined the cast in the second season. I know he won an Emmy a few years back as a guest star, but come one, everyone knows the Guest Star Emmy is for losers*. Winning for Best Supporting Actor is the real deal. If only my DVR didn’t cut out before his speech.

* No one actually says this

Shaken or stirred?

Lora is out of town for a whole week, so in my attempt to fill the void, I asked myself, “What would Lora do?” The answer, obviously, is write about Mad Men.

We’re roughly halfway through season 3, and I still think it’s the best thing on TV, but while avoiding work and reading message boards lately, I’ve discovered that a lot of people out there aren’t digging the denizens of Sterling Cooper this year. People are complaining that the show is moving too slowly, there’s not enough action, nothing’s really happening, etc., etc.

I don’t want to use the snob argument that some people just aren’t smart enough to appreciate the nuance and all that, because I don’t think that’s true. I’m more surprised at this reaction because I don’t think the show is moving any slower or subtler than either of the previous seasons. Things have happened – Betty had another baby, the grandfather moved in and then died, Don found out Sal is gay – and those things have happened in the same understated way as every other event on the show. Plus, viewers in 2009 know this entire season is taking place in the looming shadow of the Kennedy assassination. Dramatic irony a-go-go!

I agree that a few characters have been sadly underused so far (especially Joan), but the show is taking that time to further develop others. I actually kind of wonder if a lot of people got into the show on DVD and now, seeing it spaced out week to week, with commercial breaks, makes it feel slower.

What do you guys think? Still love Mad Men? Can’t stand this season? Never liked it to begin with and wish we’d stop writing about it? Explain your stance in the comments section, and don’t forget to show your work!

Umm ... OMFG!!!!!

I just always picture you guys together.

Where have I been that I didn't hear Pavement is getting back together?!?!?! (Oh right, in Massachusetts for a wedding and then busy playing catch-up at work). Still no excuse! Apparently the seminal late '90s indie rock band is getting back together for a show in New York next year and then a subsequent tour. Someone please lend me $500 and important standing in society so I can into one of these shows!!

Top 5: Tonight's Season Premieres

It's the most wonderful time of year...when my favorite TV shows return with new episodes. Tonight is a big night so let's break it down, Cajun Style*:

1. The Office - When we last saw the gang, Michael was mourning the loss of Holly and Pam was preggers. All that is sure to play out nicely over the season. I even heard rumors that Andy may explore his sexuality. I mean, c'mon. Dating Angela would turn Chuck Norris gay!

2. Survivor: Samoa - Every season, I make fun of myself for still watching this show, but I'm not gonna do that this time. I still watch because I watch with a bunch of friends...it's about community building, people!!! Speaking of communities...

3. Community - The newest addition to "Comedy Night Done Right" stars Joel McHale and Chevy Chase. Need I say more?

4. Parks and Recreation - People criticized this show last year for being "not funny," but I like it. Of course, that's mainly because I have uber-crushes on Aziz Ansari and Paul Schneider.

5. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - I've tried to get into this show, like, 5 times now. The season finale last year was pretty funny and the ads for this new season make me cry with laughter, so I'm optimistic. Sixth time's a charm, right?


*This is not only a totally awesome 30 Rock reference (which, sadly, does not return tonight), but also serves to inform you I am off to New Orleans for a week tomorrow! Email me if you want a postcard!