I’m not sure it's possible to read the Harry Potter books or see the movies without wishing you had some kind of magical abilities. JK Rowling has created some very cool spells for her witches and wizards to cast - the Refilling Charm alone would get me through a lot of parties.
In honor of Harry Potter Week here at GitW, I’ve invented a few spells of my own that would make my non-magical life infinitely easier and more interesting.
Bellus Maximus – Instantly makes the caster the most attractive person in the room, even if they’re dressed for laundry day.
Off Percentum – This would allow you to make your own markdowns! Want a shirt but it costs too much? Just keep yelling “Off Percentum” at it until the price is right. Great for recessions.
Avada Kavirus – This would kill any and all viruses in your computer, and prevent any more from entering. All for free. And to all you Mac Kool-Aid drinkers out there, Silencio!
Imperio – OK, this is a real one from the book, but I feel like I could put it very good use. The Imperious Curse allows you to make a person do whatever you want them too. Technically it’s one of the “Unforgivable Curses” and you’re not supposed to use it, but that’s just because the wizards in Rowling’s world tend to put it to ill use. I’d only use it for good things! Like forcing my friends to help me clean up after parties, and making my boss give boring assignments to other people. And, you know, if someone like Ewan McGregor happened to walk by, I’m sure I could find some wonderful uses for it then as well.
Bloggo Dinero – Instantly makes your blog earn enough money for you to retire at 35. Not that we need magic for that, right Red? Right?!?!?!
In honor of Harry Potter Week here at GitW, I’ve invented a few spells of my own that would make my non-magical life infinitely easier and more interesting.
Bellus Maximus – Instantly makes the caster the most attractive person in the room, even if they’re dressed for laundry day.
Off Percentum – This would allow you to make your own markdowns! Want a shirt but it costs too much? Just keep yelling “Off Percentum” at it until the price is right. Great for recessions.
Avada Kavirus – This would kill any and all viruses in your computer, and prevent any more from entering. All for free. And to all you Mac Kool-Aid drinkers out there, Silencio!
Imperio – OK, this is a real one from the book, but I feel like I could put it very good use. The Imperious Curse allows you to make a person do whatever you want them too. Technically it’s one of the “Unforgivable Curses” and you’re not supposed to use it, but that’s just because the wizards in Rowling’s world tend to put it to ill use. I’d only use it for good things! Like forcing my friends to help me clean up after parties, and making my boss give boring assignments to other people. And, you know, if someone like Ewan McGregor happened to walk by, I’m sure I could find some wonderful uses for it then as well.
Bloggo Dinero – Instantly makes your blog earn enough money for you to retire at 35. Not that we need magic for that, right Red? Right?!?!?!
3 comments:
For a second, I translated "bellus" from the root for "bellicose" and was really confused.
*COUGH*nerd*COUGH*
You're just figuring this out now, Becks? ;-)
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