Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Things I wish I was into

Have you ever seen something - like a hobby, or a style, or a religious cult - and thought, “Hey, that looks cool. I’d like to get into that,” but fate and laziness keep getting in your way? Well I have. And here are some examples of those things. Things I’d love to get into right now, if only all kinds of sordid reasons weren't preventing me. Feel free to share your own, or help with mine. I’d kind of rather you helped with mine, but you know, whatever, do what you want. Leech.

Tom Waits – The few Tom Waits songs I’ve heard, I really liked. I want to hear more. But dude’s got like 400 albums going back 30 years and I just don’t where to start. If anyone knows his best album, I’m all ears. (Haha. Get it? Pun).

Horse Racing – The Triple Crown has reminded me that I’ve always wanted to get into horse racing. Like, really into it - not just watching the Kentucky Derby every few years and going the track once a decade. I want to know who famous horses, jockeys and owners are. I want to speak fluidly the language of the Sport of Kings! Maybe if I’m not too busy, I’ll watch the Preakness this weekend. Yes, that’s the ticket! This is going to be huge, I can feel it.

Cooking – I’ve never really liked cooking. Cooking shows bore me, and since I grew up with a mom who makes good but plain meals, I always saw cooking as a sort of necessary chore rather than something fun and interesting. (Having a kitchen the size of my junior high locker doesn't help either). But lately I’ve grown tired of the 4 dishes I know how to make and would like to learn more. I even bought a crock-pot from a friend, even though I have no idea how to use it. I’ve been trying to get recipes and stuff off line, but its tough when you’ve never heard of half the ingredients. (Leeks? Okra? Fresh vegetables? What are these things?!?) So I think I need some kind of cooking tutor. Suggestions?

Opera – No, not Oprah. Opera. The music. Seriously. What? You think someone who laughs at lolcats can’t be high-brow? Whenever I hear opera music, I secretly like it. I bought a copy of Moztart’s Requiem after I saw Amadeus last year. Trouble is, historically inaccurate '80s biopics are about the only educational tool I have. If a youngish gal of slightly below average means and intelligence wanted to learn more about opera, where would one suggest she start, hmm?

Helping people – Look, it’s not that I enjoy being the self-centered waste of space that I am. It’s just that all my previous attempts at generosity have been thwarted. Once, in high school, I tried volunteering at a food pantry, but they didn’t really give me anything to do and the other volunteers were oddly cliquey for a bunch of supposed humanitarians. So I stopped going. And then, for about two weeks in college, I seriously considered joining the Peace Corp. But then I found out it required a lot of essays and recommendations and good grades, so that was out. I want to do more than throw money at natural disasters. I want to help my fellow man. If anyone knows of a way to do this - without taking too much time away from my television and boozing schedules – please, clue me in.

This could totally be me. But you know, from my couch.


Red said...

5 Things:

1. I know a couple serious Tom Waits fans. I'll ask them for recommendations. However, you could just listen to Scar Jo's album of Tom Waits covers and call it a day. She's way prettier than he is, anyway.

2. I don't know about getting into Horse Racing, but I do love to go to the track every summer, and it's almost that time again, so Elayna and I will definitely help you cross that off your list. Plus, we usually get hammered! Two birds, one stone and whatnot.

3. You know I can help you with this anytime. I even have some bok choy you can have to broaden your culinary horizons.

4. Opera is boring. Seriously, don't waste your time on that one.

5. I spent 3 years of my life being an actual out-there-in-the-world-doing-something do-gooder. It's overrated.

pistols at dawn said...

I don't like Tom Waits at all, but I like him in theory. His version of "Downtown Train" is pretty good, I guess.

Opera is also boring. High society people pretend it's cool, but they're wrong. Then again, I don't mind Old Country Buffet, so maybe I'm just too trashy to appreciate it.

BeckEye said...

Ha ha ha...I've had the Tom Waits conversation with many people. He's like one of those barometers of coolness in people. Well, people who are really concerned about how cool they are, so actually I don't care what they think.

BeckEye said...

And why go to the Opera when you can just watch Oprah. She gets pretty loud sometimes.

Liz said...

I think I need to clarify: I don't want to go to the opera. I just want to listen to it. And yeah, Tom Waits is kind of a hipster thing, but really have liked the two songs I've heard. Don't you judge me!

Falwless said...

I'm still laughing at the This could totally be me. But you know, from my couch.

I'm so with you.

Nathaniel said...

Liz, Red should have advised you better. For Ol' Tom start off with Nighthawks at the Diner. That should be a good start. Then if you feel froggy move on to Closing Time and Blue Valentine.