Friday, April 18, 2008

It's National Library Week!

In news that may have been helpful/interesting 4 days ago, it's National Library Week. No one really goes to the library anymore (because we can afford to buy books rather than check them out), but maybe we should.

Last night, my friend Annie and I went to the bar (I realize this is the second night in a row I've been to the bar, but it's baseball season and, while I could watch the game on my couch, if I go out, the odds of me becoming the Scary Cat Lady in 5 years drops from 95% to 89% (even though, as I told Annie last night, I hate making conversation with random guys. Most of them are so stupid and boring. Annie said I have issues. I can't say she's wrong), but this post is not about my drinking problem. It's about Libraries!). Anyway, the fellas next to us were talking about geography (see. boring). For some reason, one of the guys recited the geography of Asia for his mates. "You've got China which borders India and that borders Japan." (see. stupid) I dare say, he needs to get to the library and check out an Atlas.

Then there was the lovely, curvy lady at Starbucks this morning who thought white velvet stretch pants were a good idea. She could obviously benefit from Tim Gunn's Guide to Quality, Taste & Style (seriously, ladies, this book changed my life...or my closet anyway).

And then there's me. I supposed I should pick up How to Win Friends and Influence People, or some such thing, and try and get over my disdain for people in general and stupid men in particular. I mean, at some point, I may have to marry one.

So, support your local library because the kids need a place to make out in the future. Thank you and good day.


Falwless said...

You know, I come to you for current events and important pop culture news, and what do you do? You tell me, on the SIXTH day of the week that it is National Library Week.

You have some balls, Red. Some balls.

(p.s. I laughed my way through your post)

Garney said...

librarians are hot

BeckEye said...

You know, when David Cook and Michael Johns aren't onstage, they're likely to be making an appearance at the library.

Red said...

Fal: So sorry to let you down. I shall fall on my sword of shame now.

G: I thought about being a librarian at one point until I learned most decent libraries want you to have a Masters degree. WFT? Why do I need a Masters to alphabetize books?

Becks: The video was rad, but I kept waiting for Cooksie and MJ to make an appearance. Very misleading...

pistols at dawn said...

You can afford to buy books? What's money like? I hear it has pictures of people on it.